October SpeakStrong, Synergy Center Newsletter from Meryl Runion Rose

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Join me for these upcoming events!

FREE WEBINAR! 12 Administrative Assistant and Office Pro Roadblocks and Remedies

announceI’m offering a free webinar Wed, Oct 17th,  at 11:15 am MDT, which is 1:15 EDT. It’s called The 12 Administrative Assistant and Office Pro Roadblocks and Remedies. It’s a dual-purpose webinar – to give you quick tools to deal with your office challenges and to provide a preview into some of the areas we’ll tackle at : The Executive Administrative Professional Online Training Camp. Check it out and register here.

FYI, I plan to start a paid webinar series with limited registration. This may be my last free webinar for a while.

The Executive Administrative Professional Online Training Camp

exec-adminMy Executive Assistant Training that used to be only available onsite is now also avaialble online. Develop your skills at home or in your office: Tuesdays, Nov. 13 – Dec. 4, 2012 1-4pm ET. Learn more and register here. (Click the Virtual Training tab at the top.)

Mid-Atlantic Lean Conference

I’m presenting at the Mid-Atlantic Lean Conference November 7th. We’ll be talking about Communication Kata and taking a Kata Quest to improve processes. Join us. More info here.



crownIn the Legend of the Holy Grail, after years of languishing, the Fisher King is revived when the knight Parsifal asks:

                • Whom does the grail serve?

The King can represent thinking, or our inner CEO. Asking the King whom the grail serves is similar to asking our inner CEO:

                • Where’s your heart?

When people want help with phrasing I inquire (often indirectly) where their heart is at the deepest level. My method is more about perspective than advice. Find The Synergy Center between your heart and your mind, and you more easily find the words for clarity and the strength for action. 

A gentle-spirited friend recently became a political activist when corporate interests conflicted with community values. She knows whom she serves. She knows where her heart is. She serves her family, community and the earth. That synergy of heart and mind gives her a strong clear voice and the will to use it. She is Speaking Strong.

What ails you? And where’s your heart? It’s a good thing to know. As with the Fisher King, even just asking the question can cure and enliven action.




powerphrase icon2It starts with passive or aggressive communication. Often the next stage is to swing to the opposite polarity – the passive communicator gets heavy-handed and the aggressive communicator goes soft. Eventually we develop balance – which is assertiveness – yet can look like passiveness or aggression at times.

Don was rightfully upset that his bank told another interested buyer that he had already inquired about a specific property. That prompted the other buyer to put in their offer immediately and helped the other buyer win the contract.

The damage is done. Don wondered if he should just let it go, or write a scathing and threatening letter to the bank president. His initial considerations had no middle ground.

Don isn’t mean-spirited, so when the choices are so extreme, he is likely to say nothing – and let it eat away at him.

The fact is, Don was wronged, and leadership at the bank needs to know about it. One option moving forward is to go to the president and say:

Someone at this bank was indiscreet and I was injured. I don’t see any way to make it right now. However, I do want to let you know what happened so you can make it right moving forward.



I used to write about Poison Phrases . Who knows – I might start again. But I felt limited by that category because what is poison in one situation is helpful in others. So I’m working with the header Synergy Sabotage – trying it on for size.

tripMark works for a company that manages by consensus. Everyone needs to agree before they can move forward with a decision – in theory, anyway.

In terms of The Synergy Center, requiring unanimous consensus for everything can be too extreme and cumbersome. It  over-compensates for command-and-control leadership. While it assures every voice is heard, it can be unmanageable. But this post is about something else.

At a company meeting, Mark strongly disagreed with a decision that the IT director favored. The group overrode Mark because “only one person objects.”

Not walking the talk is synergy sabotage. If your principles say you decide by consensus and then you don’t, you’ve lost a lot more than the support of the person whom you overrode. You’ve lost your compass. You’ve lost trust. People get the message that principles don’t matter when they are inconvenient.

While I don’t recommend unanimity for all decisions, I’m even more passionate about the need to say what you do and do what you say. If you find that unmanageable, don’t just throw your principles under the bus. Live them or revise them and live that.

Now Mark is actively looking for other employment.

Another option would be to address the inconsistency. To say:

  • Either we decide by consensus or we don’t. If you override my objection and end the discussion, it’s clear we’re not walking our talk. We need to decide how we decide for real, and then do it. 



 Thanks! I hope to see you at one of my events!

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