Month: October 2013

Speaking Strong: The Computer Catastrophe

computer screen showCassia, my assistant, wrote this story to demonstrate how she used the SpeakStrong Method in her daily life:

My computer had been whining for weeks, when Meryl finally advised me to take it to have it fixed. I took it up to a PC repair place and assumed the worse. I was relieved that the problem was most likely a busted fan.

I got my computer back the next day, but noticed immediately that it was having new issues. Bad issues. Naturally, I called the repair place to ask for them to look at it. I mentioned to the tech that this problems didn’t start until after they had taken the computer apart. He dismissed this explanation and was confident that glitches were coming from the software. He ran several extensive scans, removed a few unnecessary files and handed it back with a bill of health. I paid him for his time but left uncertain.

I wound up doing this three times. On the third try, the tech finally followed my advice and began pulling apart the back panel to take a look. When he did, a screw popped out; it was apparent that the screw had been lodged in the RAM plates.

There was a screw screwing everything up!

I left relieved that my computer was finally going to be fine. It wasn’t until later that I began to realize how many work hours I lost because of this, not to mention driving back and forth, and to top it all off, I was right! I knew it was a hardware issue and I mentioned it several times but each time it was dismissed.

Meryl came in again with her good advice, and recommended that I ask for a refund. She said that this was an opportunity to practice “speaking strong”. It hadn’t occurred to me to ask. I called the shop and calmly explained how much time I had lost because of this easily avoidable mistake and that I felt I ought to receive some sort of compensation. They issued me a full refund without hesitation.

The lessons are these: If I hadn’t of asked, I wouldn’t have received; and ALWAYS listen to your gut!

 

Unconscious Limiting Decisons

Signal call 250The past several times I called Lucy, I left voice-mail invitations which she never responded to. When I saw her, she told me she received them after whatever I invited her to was over.

Yesterday we had plans to go dancing. I knocked on her door the day of to confirm, and she didn’t answer. It almost didn’t occur to me to call. But I picked up the phone shortly before we were due to leave and dialed. Lucy picked up and told me she wasn’t able to go because she was “slaving” away at her work.

Her busy-ness and wording are one story I will explore at some point – but now I want to talk about how my failed attempts at reaching her by phone led to an unconscious decision to give up trying to call her. That was a decision I made without consideration. It was based on experience, and certainly had a foundation, but it wasn’t a conscious choice that would serve me in this situation. The lesson for me is to be aware of those decisions I make and decide if they do serve me or not.

“Keep asking,” Lucy encouraged me. I’m glad she said that. I don’t take her responsiveness personally – she’s on a fabulous quest that is very consuming. But after reaching out unsuccessfully, it’s natural to put her on my unconsious “do not call list.” Who else has gone on that list without my being aware?

How about you? Do you send those signals? And, do you respond to signals like Lucy’s without conscious choice?

Loving The Analyzer in Me

thank-youI bet you didn’t know this. The term “Analysis” comes from the root “ana”, which means “up”, and lyst or lysis, which means “loosen”. Analysis originally meant loosening up a problem or situation enough that it solves itself.

Ironic, huh?! Now we think of it as tightening. 

Okay, here comes a story. Sunday I went to a wake while my hubby paid bills. It ended with dancing and was incredibly powerful. I wanted to talk about the power of the experience. He wanted to talk about paying bills for two hours.

We were in different places, psychologically speaking.

But I woke up yesterday filled with gratitude for all the things I don’t have to do because my Analyzer hubby willingly does them. I got out the sticky notes and posted thank-yous all over the house. For example, I put a thank-you on the financial statements in appreciation for all the work he did transferring our accounts.

All in all there were about 20 sticky notes. He liked it when he started finding them. By the time he got to the tenth, he was moved. There are still a few here and there he hasn’t found.

The Analyzer may not embrace the dance in the same way I do, but he provides a foundation for it.

The SpeakStrong Method starts within. I’ve internalized a lot of my hubby’s habits, and they increasingly establish an orderly world I can dance, work and play in. My sticky notes spoke to my Inner Analyzer too. I’m loving the Analyzer I live with more and more, and The Analyzer in Me as well. Life is good, isn’t it?

Express Yourself Effectively: The Clarifier in You

SpeakStrong Communication Quiz Results

Your Leading Communication Style Is…

Think about it. Your SpeakStrong Communication Style Quiz indicates that your leading style is…drum roll please…

Clarifier

Clarifier: Task-Oriented with a Relaxed Pace

Part 1 of The SpeakStrong Method Made Easy helps you express your true self effectively by deepening your experience of your natures. According to this quiz, your leading nature is Clarifier. That doesn’t mean you always embody the traits listed below. It does mean these qualities influence you strongly.

Later in the training we look at other styles and how their qualities influence who you are and how you communicate. But now it’s time to…

 Meet Your Clarifier Self

smart icon cropped

The Clarifier in You takes the time to focus deeply on the task at hand. The Clarifier in You thinks things through before taking action and creates standards and systems and procedures for most everything. The Clarifier thinks and speaks logically, which is easy to follow: going from A to B to C to D. The choice of words is precise, which minimizes confusion.

The Clarifier in You is intelligent, logical and inquisitive. Everything is interesting. How does it all work? Order and reason rule. The Clarifier even relates to people, music and beauty logically and rationally. Logic is beautiful to The Clarifier.

The Clarifier in You investigates the inner workings of things. Details matter. They are sorted, structured, named, aligned and categorized. The Clarifier in You defines success by the insights gained and the lessons learned.

graph

The Language of The Clarifier in You

The Clarifier in You uses descriptive, impersonal language that clarifies, illuminates and inspires thought.
The Clarifier shares facts and data that inform and educate.
Favored phrases are: “Research shows”, and: “The facts indicate …”
Unless listeners completely lack inquiry skills, Clarifier words get them thinking.

The Clarifier likes to say “Why?” and “How?”

Strengths and Balances for The Clarifier in You

There’s a lot to love about The Clarifier in You. You couldn’t ask for a better informed or smarter associate and team member. Review the strengths on the left.

Of course there is such a thing as too much of a good thing. The center column has possible pitfalls of the style. But observe – the right has mottos and reminders to inspire balance.

Strengths

Potential Foible

 Balance Mottos

Precise

Flips from precision to obsession

 Pick your precision level precisely

Technical

Can be cold and impersonal

 Data quantifies something alive

Detailed

Will overload, complicate and confuse

  Keep it Simple, Smarty!

Objective

Can be detached

 Speak to the subjects in your objects

Focused

Focus can be reductive and narrow

 Trees + trees = a forest

Punctual

Can obsess about time

 Close enough IS

Factual

Can be hypercritical

 Too much truth is really too little grace

Analytical

Can get overly theoretical

 Stop thinking and start trying

Deliberate

Will over-plan to avoid failure

 Failure is a great teacher

Organized

Can conflate order with effectiveness

 Order is a tool, not a goal

Informative

Might teach instead of converse

 Talk with, not at

Systematic

Routines can lack adaptability

  Routines that are ruts become graves

Complex

Can be unmanageably complex

  Complexity is crude. Simplicity is refined.

Intellectual

Sometimes substitutes logic for observation and action

 You can see a lot just by looking /
 Act your way into good thinking


A Personal, Confessional Illustration

  • In creating this landing page, The Clarifier in Me initially led me to include way too much detail. I remembered to “Keep it Simple, Smarty”, and streamlined it.
  • My initial landing page was dry and clinical. I remembered that “Data quantifies something alive” and added life to it. The next point captures how I did that.
  • My initial landing page was impersonal. I remembered, “You can see a lot just by looking” and made it more real and personal by observing how these styles play out in my own life.

I balanced the Clarifier in me to create a more effective landing page – and was personally transformed by doing so.

You

What do you think of this report? If you are a high Clarifier, it probably made a lot of sense for you. If your inner Clarifier is tempered by other styles, you likely recognized yourself in some aspects, but didn’t conclude I was talking about you.

In part 1 of The SpeakStrong Method Made Easy eCourse, you can see just how high or moderate your inner Clarifier is.

Next Step: The SpeakStrong Method Made Easy eCourse
Part 1: Know Thyself: Self Knowledge for Effective Self Expression

The fourteen day eCourse: The SpeakStrong Method Made Easy Part 1:

  • Walks you through the Know Thyself competency of The SpeakStrong Method.
  • Gives Self Knowledge for Effective Self Expression.
  • Builds a foundation for saying what you mean through style archetyping and self-knowledge.

If taking it is as transformational as preparing it has been, it will turn your world around – in a good way!
Includes
:

  • A SpeakStrong Method guide
  • An eCourse lesson each day for fourteen days
  • Action steps you can take as you go about your day
  • Printable SpeakStrong Style Quiz with graph and coding instructions
  • In-depth elucidation of the four main styles
  • Communication examples in the native voice of each style
  • Cartoons for each style
  • Ways to customize style-typing to your unique nature
  • Personal email support
  • Certificate of completion

eCourse Agenda

Lesson 1: Excellence Through Wholeness: The Method
Lesson 2: Youer than You: Explore Your Full Spectrum and Meet Your Inner Archetypes
Lesson 3: Soar with the Expansiveness of Spirit: The Visionary in You
Lesson 4: Relate with the Connectedness of Soul: The Harmonizer in You
Lesson 5: Perceive with the Clarity of Mind: The Clarifier in You
Lesson 6: Succeed with the Power of Will: The Achiever in You
Lesson 7: Optimize the Visionary in You: Build on Strengths and Balance Weaknesses
Lesson 8: Optimize the Harmonizer in You: Build on Strengths and Balance Weaknesses
Lesson 9: Optimize the Clarifier in You: Build on Strengths and Balance Weaknesses
Lesson 10: Optimize the Achiever in You: Build on Strengths and Balance Weaknesses
Lesson 11: Uniquely You: Creative Archetyping
Lesson 12: Every Voice at the Table: A Foundation of Inner Wholeness
Lesson 13: Moving Forward: Summary, Action Steps and The SpeakStrong Book
Lesson 14: Closing Quiz: Assess and Certify

Learn more at:

method

Express Yourself Effectively: The Harmonizer in You

SpeakStrong Communication Quiz Results

Your Leading Communication Style Is…

Take heart! Enjoy! Your SpeakStrong Communication Style Quiz indicates that your leading style is…drum roll please…

Harmonizer

Harmonizer: People-Oriented with a Relaxed Pace

Part 1 of The SpeakStrong Method helps you express your true self effectively by deepening your experience of your natures. According to this quiz, your leading nature is Harmonizer.
That doesn’t mean you always embody the traits listed below. It does mean these qualities influence you strongly.

Later in the training we look at other styles and how their qualities influence who you are and how you communicate. But now it’s time to…

Meet Your Harmonizer Self

hand icon nbk

The Harmonizer in You is social, friendly and all about relationships.
Everything is personal, not just family and friends: even things like shopping, services and work. The Harmonizer will even relate personally and sentimentally to things such as cars and homes. Do you name yours?

The Harmonizer takes time to experience life. Details matter: at least personal details, like the dog’s name and the kids’ games. The thoughts and feelings of just about everyone, but especially those close to you, matter to The Harmonizer in You as well. The Harmonizer in You loves and appreciates the beauty of life. Success is defined by the quality of relationships and by how much richness there is in each moment. The Harmonizer in You has the ability to savor every moment. So savor this report!

 

graph

 

The Language of The Harmonizer in You

The Harmonizer in You speaks words that nurture, connect, and appeal to listeners’ hearts and emotions.
The Harmonizer shares stories and personal examples that move people emotionally.
Favored phrases are: “How does that feel?” And: “Don’t you just love it when…?”
Unless listeners completely lack heart, they are moved by your harmonizing words.
The Harmonizer doesn’t analyze people; he/she embraces them with graceful,
personal, and aligned expressions.
The Harmonizer likes to say Yes! to others..

Strengths and Balances for The Harmonizer in You 

There’s a lot to love about The Harmonizer in You. You couldn’t ask for a better or more supportive friend and team member. Review the strengths on the left.

Of course there is such a thing as too much of a good thing. The center column has possible pitfalls of the style. But take heart – the right has mottos and reminders to inspire balance.

Strengths

Potential Foible

 Balance Mottos

Generous

Can give to the point of depletion

 Share the fruit, keep the seed

Nurturing

Will smother and/or enable

 Empower, not enable

Collaborative

Often avoids decisive stands

 Own your expertise

Supportive

Tends to neglect own aspirations

 Be your own advocate

Amiable

Will avoid conflict

 Care enough to share honestly

Attentive/listens

Can be intrusive

 Respect autonomy

Accommodating

Will overcommit

 Under-promise to over-deliver

Encouraging

Can reinforce denial

 Useful feedback is a gift

Trusting

Tends to overlook warning signs

 Trust and verify

Sensitive

Can personalize

 It’s not all about you

Subtle

Sometimes hints instead of asks

 Say what you mean

Conversational

Can lose focus on outcome

 Converse in context

Personal

Sometimes overshares

  Court first, then engage

Relational

Can be “too touchy-feely”

  Imposed intimacy is abuse

Forgiving

Prone to play victim

  Don’t water your weeds.


A P
ersonal, Confessional Illustration

  • In creating this landing page, The Harmonizer in Me initially moved me to write too personally. I remembered to “court first” and revised it to be somewhat less personal.
  • I wrote a heart-felt tribute (well, they were love-letters) to the styles and realized on reflection that they were too touchy-feely for an initial report. I remembered to “converse in context.” I can demonstrate how I relate to and appreciate the different styles without gushing about them for five pages!
  • I kept my focus too positive to the exclusion of listing foibles and offering remedies. I remembered “useful feedback is a great gift.”

I balanced The Harmonizer in Me to create a more effective landing page – and saved some heart for later.

You

How well did you relate to all of this? If you are a high Harmonizer, you probably identified with almost everything I wrote. If your inner Harmonizer is tempered by other styles, you probably recognized yourself in some aspects, but didn’t sense I was talking totally about you.

In part 1 of The SpeakStrong Method eCourse, you can see just how high or moderate your inner Harmonizer is. You also will get a better sense of how the other styles influence you.

Next Step: The SpeakStrong Method,
Express Yourself Effectively eCourse
Part 1: Know Thyself: Self Knowledge for Effective Self Expression

The fourteen day eCourse: The SpeakStrong Method Part 1:

  • Walks you through the Know Thyself competency of The SpeakStrong Method.
  • Gives Self Knowledge for Effective Self Expression.
  • Builds a foundation for saying what you mean through style archetyping and self-knowledge.

If taking it is as transformational as preparing it has been, it will turn your world around – in a good way!
Includes:

  • A SpeakStrong Method guide
  • An eCourse lesson each day for fourteen days
  • Action steps you can take as you go about your day
  • Printable SpeakStrong Style Quiz with graph and coding instructions
  • In-depth elucidation of the four main styles
  • Communication examples in the native voice of each style
  • Cartoons for each style
  • Ways to customize style-typing to your unique nature
  • Personal email support
  • Certificate of completion

eCourse Agenda

Lesson 1: Excellence Through Wholeness: The Method
Lesson 2: Youer than You: Explore Your Full Spectrum and Meet Your Inner Archetypes
Lesson 3: Soar with the Expansiveness of Spirit: The Visionary in You
Lesson 4: Relate with the Connectedness of Soul: The Harmonizer in You
Lesson 5: Perceive with the Clarity of Mind: The Analyst in You
Lesson 6: Succeed with the Power of Will: The Achiever in You
Lesson 7: Optimize the Visionary in You: Build on Strengths and Balance Weaknesses
Lesson 8: Optimize the Harmonizer in You: Build on Strengths and Balance Weaknesses
Lesson 9: Optimize the Analyzer in You: Build on Strengths and Balance Weaknesses
Lesson 10: Optimize the Achiever in You: Build on Strengths and Balance Weaknesses
Lesson 11: Uniquely You: Creative Archetyping
Lesson 12: Every Voice at the Table: A Foundation of Inner Wholeness
Lesson 13: Moving Forward: Summary, Action Steps and The SpeakStrong Book
Lesson 14: Closing Quiz: Assess and Certify

Learn more at:

method

The Native Talent of Joy

balloon icon 300hIn Yann Martel’s book Beatrice and Virgil, a music teacher tells his student:

  • The only native talent required to play music is joy.

While that overstates the power of joy in my estimate, I was thrilled to see it so clearly stated.

In my revisions of the communication style landing pages, I found myself blocked while writing The Achiever in You landing page. I was baffled about why – I have plenty of Achiever in Me. 

And then it hit me. The Achiever in Me was overreaching.

Writing these pages has literally been an ecstatic process for me much of the time. When the joy yields to effort and fatigue, it’s time to take a break, not soldier on. I had pushed too long, so I decided to break until I felt my spirit ready to return. In my break, I found plenty to say both to and about The Achiever in Us, which I recorded for when the spirit moved me.

What is hard without spirit can be easy with it. And while I think there must be more needed to play music or write a creative landing page than joy, it sure does lighten the process.

Where has The Achiever in You overreached?

Remember: “An ounce of inspiration is worth a pound of willpower.” Meryl Runion Rose. That was one of the gifts from my day of play yesterday.

 

Home Page

If you’re looking to develop a persona to impress and persuade, this isn’t the site for you. 
If you’re looking to tap into the power of authenticity, Welcome!
Come on in and enjoy this brief introduction to The SpeakStrong Method. 

 Click on the fork in the road below to continue your journey – or enjoy the SlideShare below before you embark.
Thanks! I look forward to helping you express your true self effectively!  
Meryl Road1 250
 
 

A True Power Nap Frees You From Ego

aspire icon cr 300One of my readers responded to yesterday’s post about napping by affirming her power naps. I loved it. 

Today, I napped by sinking into a yoga pose while listening to Snatum Kaur sing Servant of Peace. When the song went into the Prayer of S.t Francis of Assisi, “Lord, make me an instrument of peace.” I earnestly prayed that my SpeakStrong Method be an instrument of that peace.

That: Where there is hatred, let my creation sow love; Where there is injury, pardon; Where there is error, truth; Where there is doubt, the faith; Where there is despair, hope; Where there is darkness, light; And where there is sadness, joy.

I came out of that nap inspired. A true power nap takes you out of ego into wholeness. That was one great power nap.

Proof That You Need a Nap

sleep zzzz 250An excellent article in Scientifc American called “Why Your Brain Needs More Downtime” affirms the need for life and work balance, not just as a quality of life enhancer, but as a productivity enhancer.

I knew almost everything it says and I practice almost everything it says. Actually, I think most of us know that pushing ourselves limits productivity – or we would know it if we would pay attention.

It’s sad that we need “experts” to prove things that we could figure out through direct observation. But although I prefer first-hand knowledge, anything that gets us off overdrive is welcome. So thanks to the author, Ferris Jabr, for helping us break out of our self-destructive driven trances.

Okay, my work is done. Time for a nap. According to the experts, ten minutes is optimal.